The contents of this post is a reply to Irene's letter:
Being a Friend of God First

Dear Irene,

Hi there! I'm back! Sorry, was out of town for a few days (as if you didn't already know).

Your previous letter was very interesting, especially your description on being a "good Evangelical". I'm sure quite a number of our friends must've identified well with your description there. I suppose we'll just have to stop trying to be good Evangelicals and start trying to be good friends of God! After all, half the time people don't even really know what it means to be Evangelical anymore. So many fragments of the Christian world are claiming a right to that label.

They figured that if they could get a "recalcitrant" like you to read your bible and pray every day, regularly attend the Sunday Services, cellgroup meetings, prayer meetings, and to tithe to the church, they'd be able to move on and manufacture some more new good Evangelical Christians. But as soon as they were confronted with resistance, you became a reject. (Now I'm beginning to wonder if I'm talking about you or about myself...)

Here's the thing: when we see the kind of "church" Jesus had with his friends, he obviously modelled a community in which life was to be shared together. The first church was instituted when God came to share life together with his friends. This is a legacy that was meant to be preserved from one generation of Christians to another. Instead, what we have often preserved is a mere institution that we call "church".

Hence, sharing life together - living with God and with one another - is the very first requisite in the life of the Christian community. Without the presence of a deep friendship that takes place by virtue of God's friendship with us, there is no ministry to talk about. Then, as we journey in friendship with one another, our friendships will inevitably birth something. It is at this point that some "ministries" of the church will begin to emerge from our friendships. And yet, we walk in friendship not because of these ministries; we walk in friendship because of God's friendship. The birth of ministries in the church is merely an inevitable result of our friendships.

I am sometimes rather amazed at how people plant new churches and immediately start a host of ministries as a way of "reaching out to the lost". I wonder if this doesn't show that we're perhaps equally lost in the way we perceive "church". Church is all about gathering a community of friends who are committed to Jesus the Friend, and who are committed to one another. We live with and for God and one another. We break bread, read scripture, pray, and sing together because of our friendship with God and with one another. Anything else that results from this life together is utterly secondary. Our sole preoccupation should be in our friendship with God and with one another, and to inspire others to also come and be friends of God.

It must be clear now that I'm not propagating a community characterised by inactivity. What I'm propagating is a non activity-based church. Every Christian community must be a community of friendship. That's the starting point that cannot be compromised. Communities that have somehow missed out on this crucial starting point have to be willing to hold back on their active momentum and create space for the cultivation of friendships. And yet, there's still a danger that they may do it simply for the sake of creating more "powerful" ministries! Unless and until we can see that spiritual friendship exists for its own sake, like God's friendship with us, church will continue being just church... like the way it has always been.

Our friend Doulos has recently quoted something on his blog from Henri Nouwen. I think it's worth reading:

More and more, the desire grows in me simply to walk around, greet people, enter their homes, sit on their doorsteps, play ball, throw water, and be known as someone who wants to live with them. It is a privilege to have the time to practise this simple ministry of presence. Still, it is not as simple as it seems. My own desire to be useful, to do something significant, or to be part of some impressive project is so strong that soon my time is taken up by meetings, conferences, study groups, and workshops that prevent me from walking the streets.

It is difficult not to have plans, not to organise people around an urgent cause, and not to feel that you are working directly for social progress. But I wonder more and more if the first thing shouldn't be to know people by name, to eat and drink with them, to listen to their stories and tell your own, and to let them know with words, handshakes, and hugs that you do not simply like them, but truly love them.

To friendship!
Sherman