Here is a very profoundly excellent reflection on True Greatness in relation to questions of eternity.

Posted by SK at 08:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

A reflection on conversations with my spiritual guides on 29 January 2007

Money.

Wealth is the main considerable challenge in our efforts to live out the life of the Kingdom. The human inclination towards possessiveness of our wealth and the fear of insufficiency are the things that provoke our deepest insecurities when we think we may be sacrificing a greater proportion than others are sacrificing in our community.

The Kingdom life can never take place in an absence of community, because the nature of God can be truly represented only within the dimension of community life. Any individualistic claims for a solely personal faith in God is at best a convincing counterfeit of authentic Christianity.

And yet, living in community challenges our deepest values which would have otherwise remained unconfronted if we had settled for a non-kingdomic life. It is relatively easy for a Christian to live a religious life which is centred around the church institution; how Christian we truly are in the deepest core of our being is tested only when we subject ourselves to community life beyond the church institution.

When we find ourselves giving to others who seem to have very little to offer in return, and such giving has to be sustained in the long run, that's when our true selves are revealed. It's easy to say "I trust in God" or "God is my Provider" when everything I have belongs to me. But when everything I have becomes vulnerably subject to the needs of the community, faith in God's providence is truly tested.

"It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven". Because in heaven, no one claims anything to be his own possession - everything is shared in harmony and everyone lives for the happiness of the other. I'm not sure a rich man would even want to find himself there.

God or mammon - we can only serve one and hate the other.

Wealth and the Kingdom - to possess one, you must disown the other.

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Lord, teach me to pray "Your Kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven" with a genuinely intense desire for the things of your Kingdom.

Help me never to sell myself out to the superficialities of modern religiosity such that my lips boast so blatantly about my devotion towards you, and yet my life demonstrates a profound absence of your Kingdomic dream.

It's hard, Lord - and I know many have lost their homes, their families, their wealth, and their lives for this dream. Grant me strength that I may keep living out the dream, desiring the dream.

If I'm a fool for desiring this dream, grant me the godly dignity of a fool who would dance his way towards you, oblivious of the mocking laughter resounding around him.

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This Kingdom thing is getting a bit too hard.

Lord help me,
and all of us who still desire a glimpse of it in this life.

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Whom do you eat with? The table is a symbol of fellowship. It is where people sit and talk with one another, telling one another stories about their lives and how they’ve come thus far in their journey.

Whom a person chooses to hang out with at the table significantly speaks of his self-understanding in terms of his social identity and status. If you’re a middle-class professional, it’s almost inevitable that you’d be seen eating with others like yourself. This is the social system under which we exist – you’re planted in a social order wherein you find others like yourself. You work with them, do church with them, and go to places they frequent. So you eat with them.

At one level, we may say that the gospel necessitates us to sit with others like ourselves because we have to “reach out” to them, since we can speak their language. We often call this “marketplace ministry”, and I don’t desire to dispute the legitimacy of such efforts.

But at another level, the gospel of the Kingdom calls for something more radical. We’re called to be found at the table with people whom others never care to sit with, to eat from plates that others couldn’t bear to share from. We’re called to go and eat with those who have less than us; not just by sharing our middle-class food with them, but by also partaking in their lives by sharing in their lower class food.

The difficult part about this is probably not so much the doing it itself – the difficulty is found in making it a preference. To sit and dine with the marginalised just because it’s a Christian duty just doesn’t quite match the ethos of the Kingdom. The call of the Kingdom is for us to love the marginalised so much that we find our own middle-class social consciousness distasteful, and eventually find our authentic existence by sharing the table with the marginalised. And to prefer being there.

Posted by SK at 12:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (0)

This is a further reflection from Alwyn's post on how Christians often advance cliches like "Trust God" and hope you buy into what they're saying. I agree with Alwyn.

I think the easiest way to shake someone off (who's facing a complication in life) and still remain untainted in one's conscience is by spewing something spiritual like "Trust God" and "I'll pray for you". And then, to deceive yourself into thinking that you've somehow been part of the solution to this person's problem. It's false spirituality and has nothing to do with fulfilling the rule to love God and your neighbour.

When is saying "Trust God" or "I'll pray for you" appropriate? It's appropriate when:

1. You've actually wasted your time sitting down and listening to your friend's problem and trying to understand his situation. This is so that you have actually taken the time to care to know the magnitude of the problem without presumptuously thinking you have anything valuable to offer in terms of solutions.

2. You've actually found it within the recesses of your heart and mind to care for the wellbeing of this person. In other words, when you can tell yourself that you love this person or have made a choice to do so. And so, listening to this person isn't just something you do as a Christian duty. Because it isn't a Christian duty to listen. It's a Christian duty to love. And if you listen, listen because you love.

3. You're actually determined to be a proactive companion to this person in his journey towards seeking solutions. By this, it doesn't mean you must be the solution itself. You just have to be a companion to this person as he journeys towards seeking solutions. And together with that, be willing to stake your own resources to contribute towards the solution - yes, I'm talking about time, money, effort, and anything else.

If not, don't flippantly say "Trust God" or "I'll pray for you", please... it's downright pretentious. It's religious, but pretentious.

Posted by SK at 02:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (0)

It's been humbling for me to read some reflections posted up by a sister after our journey of learning theology together over a period of six days:

Christian Theology 1: Day 1

Christian Theology 1: Day 2

Christian Theology 1: Day 3

Christian Theology 1: Day 4

Christian Theology 1: Day 5

Christian Theology 1: Day 6

Truly, how can theology be the exclusive language of anyone other than a community of friends reflecting upon its collective engagements with God.

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Exhausted...
Satisfied...
Edified...
Relieved...
Spent...
Offering...
Mutuality...
Community...
Presence...
Friendship...
Passing...
Memory...
Remembered...

Now Lord, grant that I may retire in your arms to experience the only thing that matters in my hours of conversations - you.

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“Don’t let them get too close to you, otherwise they’ll step all over you. Always maintain a safe distance.”

Have you heard this well-meaning advice before? I’ve heard it in many contexts and given by many different types of leaders – organisational bosses, school teachers, church leaders, seminary lecturers, etc. It doesn’t shock, but it does make one wonder.

Especially in the context of the Christian faith. When Christian leaders maintain that a distance must be kept just so those under them will not take advantage of them, one needs to reflectively examine such an understanding.

For one thing, these leaders get it right that leading is a very dangerous responsibility to undertake. It is dangerous because it exposes one to the propensity of other people exploiting the leader if he is kind, gentle, and compassionate. But is the deliberate act of maintaining a safe distance the right response to this reality?

A very strong dimension of leading is found in who we are, because who we are is inevitably expressed through what we model in our lives. When a leader is cold and spatially hostile in his relationships with others, it speaks of an underlying refusal to engage in relationships which may threaten one’s sense of comfort and safety. When a leader engages with other lives with no holds barred, it speaks of the length he’s willing to go through to get connected with other lives around him.

Hurt though he may be by some people who will take advantage of kind and compassionate leaders, his struggle to rise above his injuries is the very dimension of his journey as a leader which will inspire others to be leaders of kindness, compassion and grace like himself. Judged though he may be when his flaws are noticed all too easily, his struggle to better himself challenges others to follow after his perseverance and long-suffering. Christian leaders who can’t model this virtue are perhaps better off leading in the cold hostile world where only efficiency, productivity and targets matter. They will always be seen as bosses to their subordinates, but never as superiors.

A leader can maintain a distance from those he leads. But a Christian leader, in humility and in following the way of his Master, cannot lead others without the vulnerabilities that accompany the appointment to model the life of Christ.

Posted by SK at 05:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

Sometimes I do wonder if there seems to be an over-emphasis on the total depravity and the total inability of humankind. I know that if Karl Barth were to be alive and somehow found his way into the e-world, he’d probably initiate a turbulent debate with me over this in the “comments” column. But I’m truly beginning to think if perhaps there’s at least some truth in the argument for human potential advanced by those we frequently call the “liberals” (if you’re from America, I’m not referring to the political liberals but the theological liberals).

I’m increasingly beginning to find that when we expressly show that we don’t believe in people’s potentials and aren’t willing to trust in their abilities, they actually fall for that lie. Conversely, if we show that we believe in their ability to achieve and exhibit a level of trust and confidence in them, they try their best to live up to it - and many actually hit the mark. I experienced this even with my students in the seminary. Some of the students actually did better for my subject than they did for other subjects. It isn't to my credit. All I did was believe in them and show them that I did. They did everything else themselves.

I see parents who’re extremely earnest, but who look at their children’s faults and shake their heads in disapproval. I see teachers who toil days on end at work, but who talk to their students as if they’re lesser people and have no capacity to understand the deeper things. I see middle-class Christians who give generously to poorer neighbours, but do so as if they’re doing them (or maybe even God) a favour.

What’s the point of doing all these things if we cannot somehow see things through the eyes of the God who touched the lepers, sat with the sinners, and loved the adulteress? What’s the point of disseminating our privileges to others if we cannot help people to receive from us with dignity and help them realise that somehow they too can be better people than they already are? We may not realise this, but when we give to others without honouring their dignity, it actually further robs them of their inherent worth.

When we approach the world with the lenses of total depravity, we likewise treat others as if they’re more depraved than us. But when we appreciate the value of the human person and of all creation, we begin to accord honour and trust to others because we believe that they too can become like us. And maybe they too can even help us become better people.

Posted by SK at 01:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (0)

There would be no need for sermons, if our lives were shining; there would be no need for words, if we bore witness with our deeds. There would be no pagans, if we were true Christians.

- St John Chrysostom -

Posted by SK at 01:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

“Christ beside me, Christ before me, Christ behind me, Christ within me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me.”

- Saint Patrick -

Posted by SK at 10:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

Dear fellow students and learners at the seminary,

Welcome. Welcome to a brand new academic year. And if you’re new to the theological world, welcome to the world of scholarly labours.

Welcome to an arena of Christian study, wherein your worth will very much be gauged by your academic performance. It is a circle wherein you’ll be extremely known if you’re either excellently intellectual or devastatingly challenged in your academic performance. And if you’re mediocre, then you’ll be… well, just you. Perhaps this description doesn’t sound all too encouraging. But it is nevertheless descriptive of reality, I kid you not. But still you are here; so perhaps allow me to share three basic secrets of seminary survival which have worked well for me.

Firstly, remember that you’re worth every bit of respect and honour because of what you’ve decided to give up in life to spend the next three or four years in the seminary (assuming that you have given up something, of course). And this respect and honour must be accorded to you regardless of your academic performance in the seminary. You can be sure that you’ll often be short-changed of your well-deserved dignity, but let that not rob you of your consciousness that the Father whom you love and serve looks upon you with favour. No matter how you may be treated henceforth, in the seminary and in the ministry, live with dignity. And always strive to treat others with dignity and respect. You don’t want to eventually become like those who lord it over you. Be the servant and the friend that Jesus was to the people.

Secondly, remember that you should never expect to find anymore grace here than you’ve found in the world out there. The depraved human beings you’ve been in touch with in the broken world are the very same fallen ones you’ll be in contact with henceforth. These sinners will be teaching you (if they happen to be academically qualified enough; never mind the character) and learning and living with you daily. Yes, some will be your lecturers and others your fellow seminarians. Expect them to offend you, to treat you with less respect than you deserve, to withhold grace when you most need it, and to impose the letter of the law upon you without a consciousness of the spirit of the law. When you fail, expect to be judged and even punished for your failure, no matter how repentant you may think you are. Mercy is most often an intellectual concept to be spoken about, not a virtue in praxis. But amidst all this, you will find some others who’ll truly be your fellow pilgrims in your life and faith journey, now and perhaps even beyond your seminary and ministerial life. From them, you’ll learn what it means to offer grace; to be grace. Hang on to these and be loyal to them; you won’t regret it.

Thirdly, remember that if you can’t seem to see the relevance of your studies for your ministry, it’s entirely not your fault. You’ve just been placed in a system which has plucked you out of your natural environment and planted you in an artificial incubatory environment, hoping to mould a great minister out of you through mostly intellectual exercises and some ancillary exercises which are hoped to cultivate an attitude of servitude within you. This system wasn’t created by those who sustain it now. It was created by others who passed it down to those who’re now charged with the task of perpetuating it without being critical of its existing deficiencies. Or at least, they must pretend they don’t see its deficiencies. But this systemic failure must never qualify as an excuse for your inability to reconcile your intellectual pursuits with practical ministerial relevance. It is you who must strive to translate every bit of intellectual knowledge you acquire into a visible expression of life. The onus is upon you. Do not remain fixated on those around you who seem to have failed to do so, lest you also become one of them. Focus on what truly matters.

Perhaps this may just be one of those periods in your life when you actually manage to catch a glimpse of God in the darkest moments, a ray of hope in the most devastating situations. And when you know he’s there, you’re ready to begin a life of real ministry. I wish you well.

Fellow learner,
Sherman

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When you've committed a terribly foolish mistake in life, you know you need grace. And God does - he always - has enough grace to forgive, sustain and restore a broken life. He embraces tenderly the one who comes to him in helplessness and places him on a place of dignity. He makes the sinner become truly human.

When trespasses have been committed and grace is much needed, it's often not God who's the problem - it's people who can't find the capacity within themselves to forgive. Repent all you want and submit all you want to the imposed disciplinary measures as an expression of your state of repentance, they'll never seem satisfied. They'll keep flogging you anyway.

They want your blood if they can have it. With their mouths they'll say they believe there's grace and restoration for the sinner, but with their hands they'll threaten to tear your limbs apart. And they'll keep reminding you how serious your sin is without in the same breath acknowledging they're just as depraved as you are. Had Jesus said in this day and age, "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone", I suspect many people wouldn't think twice about picking up some big rocks and await their turns to cast them.

Many people can't find it in their hearts to offer grace when they see someone else committing a wrong which reflects the gravity of their own depravity, so they are bent on inciting wrath and inflicting continuous punishment. But despite this, I'll keep living my life in dignity, not because I think I've not wronged my Lord and my neighbour or trespassed against the virtues of the Kingdom life. At one time or another, we all have - particularly me. But I'll live my life in dignity because of the peace and confidence within me of the measure of God's love and forgiveness.

And amazingly, amidst the agony of rejection and despise, I have found friends who believe in me. Because they know my heart, they have pledged to remain committed to the friendship that we share despite the social cost of being associated with a despicable sinner. It's strange how my life is the same one story but provokes extremely different responses from various people. I suppose those who know grace know how best to offer it too, and those who don't... well, they just don't.

I fear not the fury of the jury, for they're merely incriminating a fellow criminal. They hate the image of themselves they see in me. You can take away my reputation, my ministry, my vocation, and even my life. But I challenge you - try taking away my steadfast confidence in my God... you just try.

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Pictures from my trip to Myanmar have been posted up here.

Posted by SK at 09:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

For the kingdom, the power and the glory are yours now and forever. AMEN.
I say this prayer not for my own sake, but for yours. Or at least, I hope so. May every prayer I say not be for my own wellbeing and secret interest, but rather, born out of love for you and for my neighbour. But yet, let this prayer not be devoid of personal intention and commitment.

I offer this prayer to the sovereign God – so powerful, so personal, so loving – to whom belong all perfection, love, devotion, authority, and adoration. Unto whom all creation exists and breathes and lives.

I do not say this prayer alone and of my own accord. Together with all the saints, past and present, within my own local community and around the world, among humankind and all creation, I say "Yes! Let it be so!"

Posted by SK at 09:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.
I am inherently inclined to things you do not desire. But grant me the strength to remain steadfast towards you and towards the cause of the Kingdom when such trials and temptations come my way. Keep my heart ever fixated on things that are pleasant, right, pleasing, and glorifying to your cause.

Evil is all around me daily. It is not a mere phenomenon, for evil is a real entity in itself. And yet, preserve me from falling into despair in the face of such evil, for you are sovereign over all creaturely entities. No evil can befall me except that which you have allowed in your eternal wisdom.

When misfortunes seem to bewilder me and cloud my vision of your Kingdom, keep my hands tightly clenched in yours. Grant that I may not fall from the grace you have freely given. When all my concerns and queries lead me nowhere, lead my heart and mind that I may arrive at a place of peace, knowing that you are sovereign despite the pain and suffering I see in your world. Keep me knowing that the perfection of your Kingdom will ultimately prevail.

Posted by SK at 09:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.
Thank you for the daily consciousness that I live in a broken world and among broken people who are trying to reach you in the best way they know how. Thank you for the spiritual understanding that I cannot reach you in my own feeble strength, and that it takes the humble greatness of a God who would reach me instead.

Help me not to judge the actions of others, especially those who are sincerely trying. Keep me reminded that sin is not so much a physical action, but rather, a condition of existence in which humanity finds itself. In all my religiosity, I remain a sinner – redeemed by him who became sin for my sake.

I am and will always be in need of forgiveness from you and others towards whom I might have caused grievous harm – intentionally or otherwise. Forgive me, Lord, and keep forgiving me. And grant that I may also – in contemplation of your merciful grace – offer the same measure of forgiveness to my neighbour. When forgiving my neighbour hurts me inside, sensitise me to the reality that forgiving me was a most hurtful thing you had to do.

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Give us this day our daily bread.
Teach me to find comfort in the simplicity of life and to be content with that which you have, in your infinite wisdom and loving grace, given me. Help me to see all my possessions as not belonging to me, but to you and for the establishment of your Kingdom. Teach me the virtue of offering, so that I may unreservedly offer all that I have and all that I am for the love of my neighbour.

Help me to trust you for just enough each day. Not for more, and not for less. Grant me the wisdom and peace to not hoard or thrive on a life of abounding excesses. In a world where many find confidence in material security – including countless Christians – grant me the peace to be reliant on you for a measure of sufficiency which ensures my survival, and yet necessitates my daily dependence on you.

Help me to be equally concerned for the nourishment of the soul inasmuch as I am concerned for my physical sustenance. May I not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from your mouth and which is carved in the deepest depths of my heart.

Posted by SK at 01:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Your Kingdom come,
Your Kingdom has come. Your Son has come in the flesh as the Inaugurator of this Kingdom. Just as you are perfect in love, this kingdom is based on your perfection in love. You have inaugurated a Kingdom in which all humankind is reconciled to you, among itself, and with all creation.

Your Kingdom is not about power and lofty self-congratulatory institutional achievements; it is about the embodiment of a self-giving love utterly reflective of your nature in all eternity. In the life, death and resurrection of the Son, the fullness of the Kingdom is embodied. In him, your Kingdom has come.

your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
You have a dream. You dream that humankind shall be brought into this reconciled relationship of perfect love with you, among one another, and with all creation. It is a dream born in eternity, in heaven, and which will be realised on earth.

In all eternity, you have existed as a community in perfect love. Your Spirit has been the bond of love between the Father and the Son. And this Spirit has been given to us that we too may be brought into like relationship with one another and with you. The Spirit is given that your Kingdom may be established in and through our lives.

In participation in your dream, make me an agent of the Kingdom. Help me to embody the Kingdom in all its perfect love, like Christ. Use me not so much as a lofty proclaimer, but rather, a humble incarnational agent of the Kingdom.

Posted by SK at 02:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Our Father in heaven,
As I say this prayer, may I remember that you are more than a mere cosmic concierge existent for the gratification of my deepest personal desires. You are the Father of all creation.

Our Father, you are the universal Father of all – Maker of heaven and earth – who rules over those who love you and those who resist you.

You reign in heaven and on earth, and are the legitimate Originator and Owner of everything found within the realm of creation. There is nothing I can give you that is not already yours; only of your own can I give to you.

holy is your name.
Perfection is your ultimate attribute. It is not a perfection which seeks flawlessness in religiosity and ritualistic obligations. It is a perfection in love. You are holy because you are perfect in love. The measure to which you love perfectly is the measure to which you are holy and desire holiness from those who follow you.

The command to love you and to love my neighbour is the very same command to be holy. The diligent fulfillment of all religious obligations devoid of the rule to love does not constitute holiness. I cannot serve a holy God if I do not love him and his creation. To be holy is to love perfectly.

Posted by SK at 08:08 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Yes! I'm back from an 18-day trip to Myanmar! It was a soul-enriching trip in many ways. In time to come, I expect to be posting some reflective entries based on my visit there. Photographs of my trip shall be posted in the photo section soon (I'll post up a link once they're up).

A very Blessed New Year to all of you!

A brand new year ahead. This year, as it has been with all other years in human history, more babies will be born and more people will die. It is a paradox that from the day we are born, we start dying.

Who knows what this year will bring? Our future is in the hands of the Lord, and only he knows how he will lead us through the various challenges we're confronted with in the coming year.

Of course, for some, the future is a non-existent entity, and hence there is no future to be known (**cheeky grin**). I'm too ignorant to be sufficiently sure if the future is a knowable entity. But whatever the arguments may be, if there was a future to be known, he'd know it. And for me, it's enough for me to know that only he knows if there was a future to be known – this tongue-twisting reality is enough for me to entrust the future into his hands.

There is no more appropriate way to begin a year than with a prayer. The next several entries shall consist of reflective prayers based on the prayer the Lord Jesus taught his disciples. Then perhaps after that I'll post up some introspective reflections I had during my moments of solitude throughout the trip in Myanmar.

And so I pray...

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